It's A Mystery To Me

A good mystery movie, book or short story is a delight. How often do we watch what is supposed to be a mystery and half way through the T.V. show we have already figured out who did it, how they did it and why? Then we just endure the rest of the program to see if we were right. When I am in the video store, picking out my entertainment for a relaxing night, I read all the reviews on the DVD cases. I love it when it’s two thumbs up and has a comment like, “So many twists and turns that I was on the edge of my seat. . .” and BAM!. . .that’s the rental for me. I love a good adventure, thriller, whodunit movie to escape for a few hours into another time and place.

Unfortunately, most of us don’t like living our lives like this. We want to know what we are going to do today, tomorrow or in a month or at least have a clue of what is going to be happening. Don’t get me wrong, I love adventure. When I was flying with the airlines, I loved working with the military flights and being on reserve. For you non-flight crew, reserve is where you sit and wait for a call from crew scheduling to tell you where you are flying to and when. The usual call out time is two hours. That’s two hours to get to the airport and report for duty. Sounds impossible? Well, you have flight bag with your required equipment and manuals, and then you have a 22-inch suitcase with crew tags, that you stuff as full as possible with the bare essentials. You have to plan for every climate, Kuwait, with temperatures around 117 degrees or Ireland with temperatures around “rainy, damp and cold”. You don’t know when you can do laundry so you pack mostly black, a tide stick and some laundry powder. When I was on reserve, every time the phone rang, my adrenaline started pumping. I loved not knowing where I was headed. I enjoyed not knowing the people I was flying with. . . on reserve you fly with a variety of crew members who are also on reserve. Somewhere along the line, I would hop on the internet and quickly research my destination so I could tentatively plan on sightseeing, eating out, or some other activity so I could draft other crew members to come with me on an escapade.

Now this sounds like I am just a very flexible and adaptable person. I am to a degree. As a flight attendant, no matter where I went in the world, there were a few givens. I was going to eventually go home (I was out 45 days one time), I will have a paycheck, insurance, healthcare, vacation time, and all the other benefits that come with a job. This stability allowed me to live a life style of travel to exotic places with interesting people.

Now I am at a different place in my life. I am single for the first time in 27 years, 29 if you count dating and I know that God has called me to Colorado Springs to attend Charis Bible College to grow in Him. Other than that, I don’t have a clue what is going to happen. There is a part of me that knows it will be a great adventure and then there is like 75% of me that goes in and out of “peace like a river” and “tsunami waves of panic”. It goes something like this in my head. . . “Thank you Father that when I ask You for bread, You will not give me a stone, and when I ask You for fish, You will not give me a snake.” (Luke 11:11). Good, I feel peaceful. Now I hear, “Cast all your care upon me because I care for you.” (I Peter 5:7). O.K. This is great. . . I am casting, casting, and casting all my cares. What are my cares I am casting? A place to live, furniture, friends, food, tuition money, a job, insurance and we are back to panic. Helen Keller said that “Doubts and mistrust are the mere panic of timid imagination, which the steadfast heart will conquer and the large mind transcend.” Lord, I have a timid imagination and what I need is a steadfast heart and a large mind.

What is the answer? “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—His good and pleasing, perfect will.” (Romans 12:2) So now I work day by day, minute by minute to transform my mind by continually filling it with what God says about me, to me and for me. He has good plans for me, plans to prosper me, and not to harm me, plans to give me a hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11) It’s a mystery to me how this is all going to work out. I am packing a little, blue car with clothes and some essentials and driving to the place where God is calling me. I might be living on manna from heaven or meat from ravens but I am sure every step will be miraculous. Stay tuned! Same channel, same station. I will let you know.